One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
