Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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