singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize
