he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
