That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
it was like his penis was on wheels.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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