I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
