Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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