my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
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