i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
