Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize