I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
