We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
