Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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