No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
