Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize