Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize