So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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