well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
