singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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