How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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