so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
