rhymes with "ouble enetration"
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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