Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
