I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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