I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
