Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
