you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
