i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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