waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
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