just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I've blown a few things in my day
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
