You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize