i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
