the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
