What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
