Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
