I look better un-naked...
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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