I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
