i may or may not be watching the land before time
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
did you just send me my own nude
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
