So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
