I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
