I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
