im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Randomize
