Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt

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(602): View more from Arizona

making cat noises will not fix the situation.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...

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(864): View more from South Carolina

its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.

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(406): View more from Montana

I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.

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(575): View more from New Mexico

It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out

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