I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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