Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
