writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
