it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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