pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
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