Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
