the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
sarcasm needs its own font
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
