i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize