Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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