I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
