i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Terrible idea I love it
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
